comfortable silence

i was never known for silences. 

for i can't stand noiseless moments.

 

i am not comfortable.

 

it is only when alone that i am.

with my journal and pen, my pillow and bed.

 

i travel, i fly and no one will notice.

i scream and i yell and no one will hear.

i am free and alive.

unpretentious and true.

 

if i could only let you read through me!

the pages i've been hiding,

the me you ain't seen.

 

only then will you know and fully understand

the me in the midst of comfortable silence.

 

O Lord, you have searched me and you know me.

You know when I sit and when I rise;

You perceive my thoughts from afar.

You discern my going out and my lying down;

You are familiar with all my ways.

Before a word is on my tongue

You know it completely, O Lord.

-- Psalm 139: 1-4

 

Thank You, O Lord.

For You know me and love me.

In my silences, You are there.

 

You hear my cries and deepest longings,

My anger or rage, my hurts and my pains

You know me completely, yet You still care for me.

 

And now that You seem silent,

When I'm unsure of what You will

I'll trust in Your heart, Lord.

 

I will be comfortable.